Overcoming Grief

Carlyle Labuschagne
Published on: October 2012
"I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge - myth is more potent than history - dreams are more powerful than facts - hope always triumphs over experience - laughter is the cure for grief - love is stronger than death"
~ Robert Fulghum ~

Everyone will experience grief sometime in their life. What is grief? Well to me it's a very strong emotion, crippling even. And apparently there are various stages of grief, feelings that occur after you have lost something you loved. Grief can last for months or years, dragging you down, twisting your thoughts, pulling on your heart. You feel angry, frustrated, lost, depressed and even numb.
overcoming grief,imagination is stronger than knowledge
Do we ever get over it? For me I feel it's to finally say to yourself - I have to let go, I cannot control life or death, and I cannot take back the bad decisions I have made that caused me to feel like I had lost a part of me I can never get back. Talking to others is a great relief, but often a temporary one. To relate to others is a great way to release some of those pressures. Do they really don't know how I feel? How can they possibly know what I have lost if they have never felt it the way I do? Thing is - they might not, but then again you won't be able to understand their loss either.

There were some things I carried with me for a very, very long time. I had made very bad mistakes as a teenager, and perhaps as a young adult , I have lost myself and things that were dear to me , things that made me who I was, and by losing them, by changing who I was for the sake of being accepted by others - it changed my life in a way I never expected. The consequences were brutal and I carry that with me to this day. I cannot take it back. If life hands you lemons - make lemonade. I have done just that. What helped me heal after so many years? I use that pain and anger, that feeling of loss and despair in my writing, so that my words and my stories can heal others, inspire others. The greatest feeling and release comes by helping others. I also belief grief stems from fear, and fear only binds us. Nothing good ever comes from fear. You live by love or you live by fear - what do you choose?
And what have I come to realize? Grief is a part of our emotional evolution. One grows in ways otherwise not possible without these things that pull us into a dark pit of despair. Because that is where you question yourself, your motives, and your path. Always remember you are the only light in your dark.

"Don't be crippled by fear - let love give you wings".
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