Expectations, trust, and faith — three powerful words that shape the emotional fabric of our lives. Yet, most of us use them interchangeably, allowing them to bleed into each other, especially when we feel let down.

Here’s my favorite line I always quote in every speech of mine:

Expectations | Trust | Faith are three totally different things and must be totally understood before confirming which one of them has been broken to ensure you feel hurt or happy for the right things.

We often find ourselves hurt, angry, or disappointed, but pause for a moment — are we clear about what exactly has been broken?

Expectation: The Silent Contracts We Create

Expectations are often silent agreements we make in our minds. We expect friends to remember our birthdays, colleagues to support our ideas, and loved ones to always understand us.

However, these expectations are rarely communicated clearly. They arise from our own standards and stories.

When unmet, we feel hurt — not necessarily because someone has betrayed us, but because they didn’t live up to a narrative we wrote for them without their knowledge.

The real challenge is recognizing that expectations are ours to manage, not theirs to fulfill.

Trust: The Foundation of Openness

Trust is more foundational. It is built slowly through repeated actions and consistent integrity. When we say, “I trust you,” we mean we believe in someone’s reliability and honesty.

When trust is broken, it shakes the very core of the relationship. It’s not just about a failed moment but a crack in the pattern of dependability we relied upon.

Yet, as you rightly note, not every instance of disappointment is a breach of trust. Someone might lie, not to betray us, but to avoid conflict or spare feelings — misguided, but not always malicious.

Faith: The Deep Inner Belief

Faith is different still. It is less about someone else’s actions and more about the hope and belief we carry inside us.

Faith might be in a partner’s potential, in a friend’s ability to change, or even in humanity’s basic goodness. When faith feels shaken, it is often a sign that our internal beliefs have been challenged, not necessarily that someone deliberately harmed us.

Clarity is the Key to Emotional Freedom

When we fail to differentiate these three, we risk labeling every disappointment as a “trust issue” — and as a result, we burden ourselves with unnecessary resentment.

Yet another line from my speeches I would like to share:

Broken expectations and faith that gets hurt are both something we could correct and deal with internally.

By learning to pause and examine:

Did this person break an explicit trust, or did they just not meet an expectation I set? Was it my faith in their potential that was shaken, rather than their actions alone?

We empower ourselves to heal with compassion rather than condemnation.

A Life Lesson for All of Us

The next time you feel hurt, take a breath and ask yourself:

Is it your expectation, your trust, or your faith that has been affected?

When we learn to make this distinction, we invite more empathy into our relationships and more peace into our hearts.

We become less reactive and more reflective, transforming moments of pain into opportunities for deeper understanding.

Finally.. Hope you don’t find yourself in a state of being broken but if you do, I truly hope this piece helps

In a world moving at breakneck speed, clarity of heart and mind is a rare gift. When we learn to understand the nuances between expectation, trust, and faith, we not only protect our emotional well-being but also nurture more authentic and resilient connections.

Perhaps the greatest act of love — for ourselves and others — is to feel hurt for the right reasons, and to heal in the right ways.

#EmotionalWisdom #RelationshipClarity #iUInspires