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Letting go
"If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace." ~Ajahn Chah
Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. From our childhood we are being criticized for some or other things.We are being compared or insulted for some reasons. Due to these reasons we hold on anger, resentment and thought of revenge. This wound can leave you with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness and even vengeance.
The act that hurt or offended you might always remain a part of your life, but letting go can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other more positive parts of your life. Letting go can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you. Letting go doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Letting go brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life. Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for happiness, health and peace. It leads to healthier relationship, less anxiety, stress and hostility. It also improves our self-esteem.
If you are not letting go, you might
- Bring anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience.
- Become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can't enjoy the present.
- Become depressed or anxious.
- Feel that your life lacks meaning or purpose, or that you're at odds with your spiritual beliefs.
- Consider the value of letting go and its importance in your life at a given time.
- Reflect on the facts of the situation, how you've reacted, and how this combination has affected your life, health and well-being.
- Actively choose to forgive the person who's offended you, when you're ready.
- Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life.
As you let go of grudges, you'll no longer define your life by how you've been hurt. You might instead find compassion and understanding.
The act that hurt or offended you might always remain a part of your life, but letting go can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other more positive parts of your life. Letting go can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you. Letting go doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Letting go brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life. Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for happiness, health and peace. It leads to healthier relationship, less anxiety, stress and hostility. It also improves our self-esteem.
If you are not letting go, you might
- Bring anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience.
- Become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can't enjoy the present.
- Become depressed or anxious.
- Feel that your life lacks meaning or purpose, or that you're at odds with your spiritual beliefs.
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Letting go is a commitment to a process of a change. To begin, you might:- Consider the value of letting go and its importance in your life at a given time.
- Reflect on the facts of the situation, how you've reacted, and how this combination has affected your life, health and well-being.
- Actively choose to forgive the person who's offended you, when you're ready.
- Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life.
As you let go of grudges, you'll no longer define your life by how you've been hurt. You might instead find compassion and understanding.
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Any facts, figures or references stated here are made by the author & don't reflect the endorsement of iU at all times unless otherwise drafted by official staff at iU. This article was first published here on 2nd November 2015.
